I've written papers, talked about, and sent money to organizations fighting sex trafficking. This, however, was my first hands on experience. I'm not going to outline everything we did and write out the day to day experiences in this blog post, although I may later because I did keep a journal during this trip. I just want to share my heart and express how extremely blessed I am to have been able to go on this trip. This trip was the most spiritually, emotionally, and mentally challenging and exhausting thing I have ever done. It was also one of the most life changing things I have ever done and it grew my heart and passions for Sex Trafficking victims like never before. Through this trip God gave me direction and more in depth vision for my future and what I want to do. By listening and shadowing the leaders and JM and Rise Up I gained so much training, knowledge, and wisdom.
Physically this was the easiest missions trip I've ever done. We were in the states, we had showers everyday, ate at restaurants, and got our nails done on our free day (girl only trip). However, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally is was exhausting. Fighting Human Trafficking isn't just about fighting pimps and johns. It's about rescuing and restoring broken lives and letting Christ use you to set the captives free. Satan doesn't like that and the demonic hold on not just the girls, but everyone involved, is very real and very strong. We did a prayer drive, where we drove around to tracks (areas where prostitution rings are ran on a regular basis), massage parlors (small brothels), and strip clubs; and we just prayed. The heaviness at these places was so heavy, dark, and real that you could physically feel it. It was tough to press through, sometimes it was even difficult to pray and it was then I just had to say God, you are bigger than this and trust that he knew what I was trying to pray and what needed to be said.
One of the hardest things for me came during strip club outreach (we went into the dressing rooms of strip clubs and gave the girls goodie bags, information, and just showed them the love of Christ.) The first night we were in North Carolina we had a hangout night with some of the girls from the clubs. We played spoons, ate pizza, did each other's nails, and just hung out. There was one girl that I just loved instantly. She was so sweet, smart, talented, and adorable. I just couldn't believe that she was being exploited (not all girls that work at strip clubs are being illegally trafficked (although a lot are and all are targets for pimps) they are all being exploited). She even expressed that she wanted to leave because she kept finding herself in dangerous situations, but she didn't know how to get out. The night we took the bags to the clubs she was there getting ready to work. I hugged her and talked to her; told her I loved her. As we were leaving it took all I had to keep a smile on my face. My heart was breaking for her. I loved her so much and saw so much beauty, worth, and potential in her and I just wanted to take her from that club and help her. But, I couldn't. I felt so helpless and I had no clue what to do. To make matters worse on the way back to where we were staying we passed several girls working the street and my heart broke even more. I was suddenly feeling despair. I was like, God why is this happening? Why do I feel like this? I don't think I can do spend my entire life doing this, it's too hard. What could be worth this broken heart? About that time Aimee, the lady we were working with (also founder of Rise Up Ministries), got a phone call from one of their staff. The staff member was with a girl they had rescued from prostitution just days earlier. Amy put them on speaker phone and all of a sudden piano music filled the vehicle and the most joyful and strong voice came through the phone singing, "I'm trading my sorrows, I'm trading my shame..." As Aimee began to cry I joined her. Just days before this girl was being forced to have sex with 10-20 men a night, she had cried for God to take her life. She wanted to die, and now, now she was singing about giving up her sorrow. It was then that I truly realized that she was worth it. That girl was worth my broken heart. Even if she is the only girl I ever see broken free from the bondage of trafficking, she is worth my broken heart. I realized that this is worth giving my life to. It's worth the sleepless nights, the stressful hours, the pain of letting Christ break my heart for what breaks his; they're all worth it.
During this trip I had my first hands on training for my calling. I had my heart seriously broken for these girls. I experienced first hand the spiritual battle surrounding trafficking victims. My eyes were opened to what I'm getting myself into. My heart and passions for these women grew. And, I also felt the joy that God feels when one of his precious children is proclaimed free, their chains are broken, and they are brought home to their father. I learned what makes it worth it.
~Carrots
"Some people go through life trying to find out what the world holds for them only to find out too late that it's what they bring to the world that really counts." - L.M. Montgomery Anne Of Green Gables
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