Ron Weasley Is My Security Blanket

            I hate breaks (Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, etc.) for two reasons…or rather I hate two things about breaks. I hate leaving for break and I hate coming back break. I hate leaving for break because I hate saying goodbye. I don’t like leaving people behind…I spend every single day with these people. They are a part of my life. We work, eat, play, and grow together. Sometimes, I think I’m too attached to people because I barely know how to function without them. So, I hate leaving for break because I don’t like leaving people…I cried at the airport dropping people off. I cried hugging people goodbye at church. Heck, I even cried when I didn’t get to tell someone I don’t even like goodbye. Even if I don’t like you I’ll miss you because I don’t remember how to do life without you. Then inevitably I spend the first 2-3 days of break lamenting my loneliness and feeling empty and alone.

            Then I start loving being on break. Having no responsibilities, not having to worry about other people’s problems, not being in charge of anything; just being at home with the people I love the most and enjoying spending time with them. I’m very close to my family and I love doing things like daddy-daughter dates to Quick Trip, having tea parties with my sister, and helping my mom with unruly school kids. I enjoy family dinners, playing with my animals, reading books, and watching movies. I enjoy being part of a family again. I miss it. I miss being with my parents and sister, I miss them so much it hurts sometimes. I miss being a big sister. Sometimes distance and responsibilities at HAO make me feel like I’m not being the best big sister ever. I miss my little sis. Yet during break I was able to give her my complete undivided attention and attend the first Orchestra concert of hers that I’ve been to in almost 3 years! She is fabulous. I just loved being home. It was great and I suddenly didn’t want to go back. I wanted to stay home with my family and friends. I wanted to be normal and just got to school or whatever. I even asked my best friend from back in Missouri if she would pack up my room for me…she told me no. I told her I didn’t want to come back because I was scared and nervous. I was homesick and all kinds of things. Then I told her that I would come back unless she got me Ron Weasley because if I had Ron everything would be okay and I could handle all of the stress.

            Needless to say I went back. It was what I was supposed to do, but that didn’t make it easy. I missed my parents and sister. I missed home…plus this time saying goodbye to Kansas was real. This time I knew I would never be coming back for more than occasional visits and that’s a tough place to be in. I got back to my house and loaded everything in. Mumbled hello to my housemates that had returned before and went to my room. I turned on my light and found that my room was completely covered in pictures of Ron Weasley. COVERED! I counted around over 20 (so obviously not all of them are shown here). I just started laughing and suddenly I was okay with being back. The fact that I have friends that love and care about enough to spend time cutting out and taping up pictures of Ron all over my room/bathroom just to make feel better made me realize how lucky I am. So what if it’s difficult, stressful, or away from my family. It’s where I’m supposed to be. It’s where I want to be. Ron Weasley is my security blanket because it took me a bunch of tiny Rons all over my room to make feel like I was home. Where I belong. As to what it means about my feelings toward Ron Weasley…maybe just a bit obsessed but who cares. I have the best friends in the world and thanks to them I have the best room too.

~ Carrots

Together but apart

Crowhead here and I am a jerk. Carrots so eloquently wrote about our friendship and even brought me to tears as she talked about it. While sadly I couldn't say anything as beautiful about our friendship. Not because I don't value our friendship but because I am truly speechless when it comes to our friendship. 

When I think if Carrots and my friendship I think of a James 5:16 friendship. James 5:16 in the Amplified says this: Confess to one another therefore your faults (your slips, your false steps, your offenses, your sins) and pray [also] for one another, that you may be healed and restored [to a spiritual tone of mind and heart]. The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working]. 

If that doesn't describe our friendship I don't know what would. I can and have told Carrots so many things about my life but she never belittles me or makes fun of me she prays and encourages me. When the verse says confess I mean confess. Not just lightly push around the subject and not specify details. I mean confess it all. The good, the bad, and the shameful.  Once those things are in the open between you it gives both of you the opportunity to be accountable. Her being held accountable to keep me in prayer. Me accountable to having someone to talk to about the hard things that I am going through.  In exchange when she is going through something she knows she can come to me as well. 

I touched on this slightly but the second half of James 5:16 talks about praying for one another. Which is huge when it comes to the close bosom friend relationship that we have. If you know the  trials of someone else's life shouldn't you be praying for them? Not only should you be the others biggest supporter but also one of their biggest spiritual coverings. 

I don't know how I could have lived the last year of my life without Carrots. And I can't wait to see where we will go and serve God together. Seperate we are strong, but together we can do many mighty things for the good of the kingdom! 

"A bosom friend--an intimate friend, you know--a really kindred spirit to whom I can confide my inmost soul. I've dreamed of meeting her all my life. I never really supposed I would, but so many of my loveliest dreams have come true all at once that perhaps this one will too. Do you think it's possible?' -Anne of Green Gables

Carrots and Crowhead Together Again and Other Aspects of Our Friendship

     “We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?' asked Piglet.

Even longer,' Pooh answered.” 

― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

     As life goes on we grow up and as we grow up we change and as we change so does everyone and everything else. With change comes this amazing ability for people to move away and move on. Also with change comes this incredible ability to find friendships and relationships that defy moving away and moving on because they're stronger than growing up...they're stronger than life. I feel like I legitimately have 2 maybe 3 of these friendships. The kind where you just kind of pick up where you left off and it's like you never went a day without seeing each other. Without being part of our everyday life they still know everything about you and they are still your other half. (Well maybe not other half...but they are a part of you.) One of these is my lovely Crowhead :)

     This weekend Kate came all the way to Missouri from Canada!!! I was so stinking excited and happy to see her. When she got in I was still asleep and she just came in a laid down on top of my in an attempt to wake me up. I just rolled over, rolled back over and hugged her, sleepily told her about the dream I had just had, then I rolled over and went back to sleep for a whole 5 minutes. We then got to spend all Saturday together running around town with one of our other close friends, hanging out at the house watching movies, and then going to a Saturday night youth service that I work at. It was so much fun and it was just like nothing had every changed...like we weren't in different countries. We had one or two serious conversations, we talked about music, guys, movies, and the everyday going on in our lives. We relived memories and inside jokes and just enjoyed the time we had to be Carrots and Crowhead (we also agreed to get tattoos together.) Sunday we went to church/HAO January class' graduation and then went to my church's Ugly Sweater Christmas party and had an absolute blast! She met my "new" friends and I got to hear all kinds of stories about hers. Being Best Friends doesn't mean that we won't have other people that we become close to or that we'll share our secrets and dreams with...being best friends means that at the end of the day we will always be friends, that she's the person I'm closest to no matter the physical distance, it means that she will always be one step ahead of all of my other friends when it comes to knowing everything about me, and it means that even when we go months without seeing each other it'll be like we were always together.

     Sunday night I had to tell Kate goodbye because she was going to head back to Canada in a couple days and I was heading to Kansas for Christmas break early the next morning. I cried...I cried a lot. I cried telling her goodbye and I cried after she left. I cried because she is my best friend and I miss her. I miss her like crazy.  Canada is far away and who knows when the next time Carrots and Crowhead will be together again will be. I cried because when you have a best friend that you don't live near when you are together you realize that a small part of you was missing while you were apart and when you get to see each other that part comes back. God designed best friends because we aren't meant to go through life alone and when you have a best friend you and that person become part of each other in some ways. So, I cried because even though I know we will keep on going on being best friends it still hurts to be separated from my chosen sister so much.
     As Winnie-the-Pooh says, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” 
― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh, and I am. I am so thankful for Kate because she's amazing. She knows things about me that literally no other human being on the planet knows about me. She knows my deepest darkest secrets, all of my obsessions, my likes, and dislikes. She knows all of my quirks and what to do when I'm sick or having an allergic reaction. She is my very best friend and to be completely 100% honest she is the best friend anyone could have and I am so thankful for her. I don't know what I would do without her and I'm glad I have her. I love you Crowhead!  

~ Carrots

“Kindred spirits alone do not change with the changing years.” 

― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of the Island